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As a busy mom, most days I feel like I've been run over by a truck.
Each night, as I crawl into bed--at whatever hour my 6-week old baby allows me to--I count my regrets instead of my blessings. I don't like it. Most of my regrets have to do with time. I don't have enough time. I want to cherish my girls' childhoods because I know I'm going to blink and tomorrow they will be grown up.
I regret not taking enough pictures. I don't have a nice camera, so I'm just snapping iPhone shots, but I don't even do that enough.
Some of my regrets have to do with not being good enough. A good enough mom, wife, friend, etc. etc...
I regret not doing fun things with my 3 year old because I'm too tired; or because, you guessed it, there's not enough time. I regret not taking enough time to pretty myself up for Jerry. I regret not driving an hour (only an hour) to my best friend's house to visit her. I regret, I regret, I regret....!!!
In about two weeks, I will be back to work full-time and my day will go something like this: alarm goes off, get myself ready, get the girls ready, race out the door to drop them off and get to work on time, spend all day at work (thinking about the laundry and cleaning and projects that aren't getting done), leave work, pick up the girls, make dinner (or, let's be real, entertain kids while Jerry makes dinner), baths, teeth brushing, potty-training horror, a few snuggles then bed. EXHAUSTED.
On Monday it seems forever until Friday. But then On Sunday night, we look at each other and wonder what happened to the weekend?
I know I can't make more hours in the day. But as I see my little family growing, I feel precious memories drifting away from me. I want to hold on to them. So although I don't expect anyone to read this blog, I am writing it in an attempt to capture - real time - those memories and experiences we have; if only to give myself peace of mind. To know that somewhere I have an account of what we were doing/thinking/feeling at this time in our lives.
I'm sure I'll still never take enough pictures, but hopefully, I can learn how to make quality time out of what little quantity time we have. And it will just be enough.
How incredibly corny.